Stable, toward the good side...

The scan showed no growth and even a little shrinkage, so we are pleased.

It's still a long way from me being operable, but we are moving in the right direction. I now need a biopsy of the spot on my liver, hopefully to rule it out of the cancer equation. That will happen in a few days, then we'll plot the next treatment based on those results... either more chemo or a chemo/radiation combo...

So my work continues...

Waiting

This is a picture of the growing collection of painted bamboo "healing sticks" that is springing up in the front yard. It started with an old friend painting a stick red to represent me, then adding other "protective" sticks around it to aid in healing... Now lots of people have been making them and the tribe is growing...

I finished chemo Wednesday and now I have to wait till next Tuesday for the scan and then Thursday for the results... I'm trying to focus on how healthy I feel, hoping that it will be represented in the scan...the alternatives are something I'm staying away from for the moment.

There will be a week or two between treatments and I welcome the rest. Being off chemo and getting my energy back is something that I really look forward to... optimism finds a chance to slip back into my world when I feel normal.

All the support and healing acts that have been coming my way continues to be one of the positive blessings that has come with this disease...I am grateful for all the help... It means more to me than I can express, and continually reminds me of what a special community we live in.

A Chinese friend who gives me weekly acupuncture treatments brought a Feng Shui Master to help heal me. It was a curious and magical experience...part astrology, part traditional healing and part shamanism. He made lots of strange and interesting suggestions (all through translation), many of which we have enacted. It has involved things like: me switching bedrooms and lots of red paint. Ask me sometime about the ritual that involved burying a piece of granite in the back yard to engage and control the ghost spirits which came into my studio with all the animal skulls I've collected over the years... It was something!

I feel like these healers are like angels that have showed up, focused on helping me, so I'm embracing their suggestions as part of my plan to give myself over to the chance of making it through this...

Yesterday brought my last infusion and the beginning of my last week of chemo before I get another scan on the 27th... That will be the end of six - 3 week cycles of chemo since I began down this road...time flies slowly in this case...

By the end of this month I'll know better where I stand and then we'll make decisions about the next phase of treatments. My doctor was cautiously optimistic last week, noting that I would probably not be in such good health if the cancer was spreading so MAYBE the chemo is working... The difficulty comes in trying not to get too excited by such small statements when the general prognosis is not so positive.

Separate from the chemo, I do feel very good so I hope that reflects progress...I continue to push on all fronts.

Monika and I are going to visit Amanda in Boulder this weekend, so I'm really looking forward to that. She will be transferring back east second semester to be closer to us during this odyssey... I'm very happy about that...

xo D

Rained Out

Our canoe trip was rained out but We had a great visit with old friends and did manage to to walk the dog in the rain and see the Sox game (no rain) on Saturday night.

Not being on chemo reminds me of my old self energy wise. The funny thing is that between diet, yoga, exercise and less hectic living, I'm the lightest and healthiest than I've been in 20 years.

Ironic under my current circumstances...

On Thursday, I start my last 2 week round of chemo... then I move to 5 weeks of a chemo and radiation combination...